Don't Drink the Water!

EPA Didn't Know Anybody Was Still Drinking Water
April 26, 2006 | Issue 42•17

WASHINGTON, DC—Environmental Protection Agency Administrator Stephen Johnson apologized during a press conference Tuesday for what critics called "flagrant oversight and neglect" in monitoring ground- and tap-water quality across the United States, claiming that his department was unaware that citizens were still consuming it. "I can honestly say we had no idea that anyone used faucet water anymore," Johnson said. "Bottled water, sure—I have some here on the lectern. But if there really are people out there still drinking tap water, all I can say is you're better off not knowing what's in there." Johnson added that official EPA policy is that Americans should stick to sports drinks.

© Copyright 2006, Onion, Inc. All rights reserved.The Onion is not intended for readers under 18 years of age.

Well, okay then...

I think I might be getting the hang of this...or at least starting too...I am, I must confess, a virginal blogger...but the learning curve seems to be flattening out. As I write this, one of my all time "cult" faves is on: "Tremors 3"...best line? "what kind of supreme being would condone such irony?" I know, a bit quirky, but if you can't be honest in a blog, then where??? Not much esle to commesnt on today...it has been a weekend reminiscent of Ireland. Cool, damp, steady drizzle...the sun occassionally peeking through just to coak the Irises out...a good time to curl up on the couch and read Breakfast at Tiffany's for the 18th time. Alas, with exams looming on the horizon, it has been more a "try to find the Watteau slide for my Art History final" and defining the word "synergy" for my definition paper in English...oh well, the only way out is through, right?

Question of the day: Would you rather have the ability to see ten years into your own future, or see twenty years into the future of the world??

..and the Bees

I learned some things today about bumblebees. I have been getting my deck ready for spring and summer, planting herbs and cleaning etc. with the kid's help. Over the past couple of days we noticed a couple of bumblebees bumbling around our deck. They always hovered in the same place. Tonight though there were 4 of them, and slightly more aggresive, perhaps due to the fact that i was wielding a fly swatter and Emily a garden hose sprayer. They would not leave, and continued dive bombing us. We finally decided they must be building a nest, so i had Emily do a little research to find out what it was all about, and here's what we learned: 1.) Bumblebees live in a colony with a queen, nurses and worker bees, numbering upto 2,000. 2.) Bumblebees have only one natural predator, and that is a skunk. 3.) Bumblebees are on the endangered species list and killing a bumblebee can carry the same penalty as killing a bald eagle. 4.) Unlike other species of bees, bumblebees can sting multiple times and not die afterwards. 5.) The colony is living under our deck. Having given this much careful consideration, and having weighed the pros and coms of skunk ownership, we have decided to try peaceful coexistence. On the upside, bumblebees typically dont attack unless threatened and colonies do not nest in the same place twice, so if we make it through this year we should have filled our responsibility to endangered species everywhere.

The Birds...

An exciting week on the nature front...but first a little background:

Almost a year ago to the day, we had roof repairs made. We did this for a number of reasons: the roof had serious leakage in places, and a family of birds had taken up residence inside the eaves, basically in our kitchen ceiling. I hadn't thought much of it since, the roof was repaired, leak stopped, birds evicted - end of story, right? Well it wouldn't be much of a post now, would it?

So, the weather being beautiful (but extraordinarily dry) I was out on the deck watering my spring plantings. I was vaguely aware of a bird splashing in what little water must have accumulated in the gutter above the sliding glass door behind me. I assumed he was a resident chickadee at the Maple Inn Birdhouse, (obviously nailed to the Maple tree just off the deck). I made a light salad for dinner that night and we ate on the deck "al fresco". As we sat in the twilight, I looked up and noticed the bird, again standing in the gutter on the roof. As he was standing in nearly the spot where we had the access hole repaired a year ago, I decided to take a closer look. I stood on a chair and realized that what I had taken for a gutter downspout was, in fact, a perfect square of flashing that had been PEELED back from the eaves in order to build another nest in my ceiling! I was amazed - it was a perfect door, and I have no idea how this little bird had the ability to bend a four inch square piece of metal away from my house...After giving it some thought, I have decided that this is one of the birds that hatched from my ceiling last year, and had returned to start it's own family this year. The fact that his previous residence didn't exist anymore proved no match for instinct. A reminder to me that in reality, these animals have emminent domain, and they are tolerant enought to allow me.

My Horoscope...

Below is today's horoscope for Virgo...is it me, or is anyone else gettin' the sicko parallels??? I'm a pretty skeptical person..I read this at night to see how on target it was...and this is scarily accurate (also not something I am particularly proud of...but I'm still in therapy, give me time, maybe I'll find a Mercury Rising or something!=) catcha' later - sha


"You don't just think deeply, you feel deeply. You consider deeply. You imagine how things could be different on a deep level. You process deeply. You feel strongly about the world in both its spiritual and physical dimensions, and you aren't content if you haven't been able to penetrate to a deep level of understanding of your milieu. So get started. Don't sacrifice your goals for anyone. Pressure being put on you may be a bad sign. Remember that an initial pass at a project is simply that: an initial pass. No one requires that it be perfect (except, possibly, you). Be confident enough to listen to the criticism and do what helps the overall outcome."

Easter Brunch...

so I'm wandering around the Brasserie in Crown Center scoping out the food stations at brunch. Man, they had everything! Standard omelettes, waffles etc...a seafood bar replete with salmon, mussels and to die for scallops...I get to the meat stuff and am chatting it up with the Chef:

"So, I see the ham out, but what else do you have today?" I ask.

"well, we have lamb, roast beef, corn chowder and rabbit stew."

I stopped cold, glancing at the costumed Easter Bunny taking a photo op with some kiddies in the background. The irony was too much and laughing, I said, "Rabbit Stew...AT AN EASTER BRUNCH!?" I lifted the lid to the nearly overflowing crock, "Many takers???" I quipped with a wry grin.

"Not so many...I can't figure it, it's wonderful, I made it myself!" was his reply.

I said, "You know, Mother's Day would be a better sell...at least on that day, we already know the rabbit DIED..."

He said he'd prepare it then if I promised to come back =)

it's rabbit time!!!

some quick thoughts before the bunny gets here...I was doing some thinking about my earlier "rudeness" post. It came to me when I realized that Thursday night marked the beginning of Passover. We all pretty much know that matzah (unleavened bread) is a component of the Passover meal. I have always thought that represented the fact that when the Jews were freed from Egypt, they were short on time and didn't have a chance to let the bread rise. This is true but I also learned that it serves as a reminder in this season to "deflate" our egos. It helps us remember that humility is a component of humanity, something I did not know. I thought this was a good tie-in to the rudeness issue and egocentrism in general. To be self-absorbed and inflated is insulting on our part as children of God - whatever your perception of a divine being may be.
I just thought I would pass that thought along as food for the soul as we all go about our Easter and Passover reflections.

On that note, I wish you all well, and that the bunny hops by your place with lots o goodies...if that's your thing. Either way, welcome in spring by sending some positive energy into the universe and remember that we're all active participants - we can choose positive and fulfilling for ourselves and others, or negative and toxic which is nothing but your trying to lower the bar for everyone around you. It's easier to try to bring others down to our level, but it helps everyone when you work to bring yourself up.
Much love and good vibes...shash

...A Vale of Tears

Today was a particularly challenging day on many levels. As perfect as yesterday was, today proved a constant stream of difficulties. If you can dream it, it went wrong. Unable to solve any of my problems at home, and my morning class having been cancelled, I decided to work on some projects in the art lab and sit in on the morning classes. It was good to focus on something other than myself, but the gravity of the morning's events weighed heavily on my spirit. My friend (and also the art director) asked me what I had planned for Easter. My reply: "I am going to pull a rabbit out of my hat." I thought it a telling pun. We both laughed. In fact, I am not looking forward to Easter, except that we have been invited to dinner with friends. As I left the lab, my temporary asylum, the oppressive heat of the afternoon (unusual for the season) was as physically suffocating as my personal troubles were to my emotions. I came home, really looking forward to seeing Emily. Her even keel was just what I needed to shift gears. I walked in to a ringing telephone. It was Emily, just checking in. I had forgotten she went straight to a babysitting job from school. I was deflated in the realization, but glad to hear her voice. I told her I missed her, and she told me that she had an off day, and wanted nothing more than to be home. Those words felt so good. Dylan got home, and bounded in the door bubbling about his spectacular day. Those two interactions did it for me. At the very moment that I was staring down futility and hopelessness, with no more solutions and no end in sight, my children held me up - with an everyday gift of love.

A Barrel of Laughter...

what a phenomenal day! It was the Spring Fair at school so there was a huge picnic in the quad. I met up with some friends from psych and we ate and ate...brats, burgers, potato salad, beans, cotton candy...man, do they know how to entice poor college students - FREE FOOD!! There was a karaoke set-up with a sound booth and they were burning cd's for people who did it...needless to say, I was not one of them =)...Dylan rode the mechanical bull and we all watched the impromptu gymnastics tournament on the inflatable Twister game...my friends Bridget, Leslie, Mo and Aaron convinced me to try the 30 foot inflatable slide...vertigo and all...it was a blast, but I don't envy whoever was behind me on the highway home...just a wee bit dizzy! I figured I was still less impaired than the happy hour boozers (who are NEVER drunk, right?) on the highway with me. Smiling on the way home, I realized that for the first time in a VERY long time, I had a couple of totally free hours, that cost nothing, with friends but off the usual treadmill...and I never ONCE thought about bills, or finals, or the price of gas...I was free. What a recharge. Coming home to the routine juggling act was that much easier...and I looked forward to it that much more.

Dylan ate a clam...but I told him it was...

deep fried string cheese...






and Emily looking stunning as usual...

A beautiful day...

There was a discussion today on society being more "rude" in general now than it used to be. After initially agreeing, I did some thinking and now wonder if there aren't some contributing factors:...am I all wet on this?
1) technology has made everyone far too accessible at any opportunity.
2) with a "true" middle class obsolete, we are only left with the rich (and people living rich - only one paycheck away from disaster) and the "monetarily challenged"...this huge gap only serves to highlight class differences, therefore heightening tensions and defenses.
3) people (in my opinion) now personalize everything to the extreme. Yes, in general, customer service has become more homogenized and less personal, but peoples perceptions have changed as well.
4) Egocentrism! The theory that the world revolves around you, and that everyone who enters your world better be a mindreader!
5) People do not apologize anymore. How about saying, "Hey, I'm sorry your order was wrong." or "I'm sorry, I'm in a bit of a rush."

When you experience a negative interaction with a stranger, at a store, on the bus - wherever, how many times do we walk away saying, "What the heck did I do to them?" The answer is usually NOTHING. We never consider the fact that maybe that person had a crummy day and we just walked into it. Maybe they lost their job, spouse, cat...whatever. How often do we slip on their shoes and try to see that their goal in life is not solely to tick us off? Are we that important to them?

Conversely, how often do we initiate the negative encounter without intending to, by being distracted, impatient, or just not "in the moment"? Oddly enough, it is never OUR fault: "You should have SEEN this clerk, he was a complete idiot...don't they train those people?!" You are still griping hours later, and that person has taken care of 75 people since you - you don't exist to them anymore. Who ends up with the negative baggage...not the idiot clerk =)

It's true that perception is reality but the rub's in the perception; both in what others project and how we percieve it, and what we, ourselves project. I don't think it's a question of rudeness escalating, but more that tolerance has waned. People aren't mindreaders...they're not out to get you, so don't personalize...it isn't your problem!...egocentrism is supposed to stop by age 8!

Didn't mean to vent - what do you think...are we ruder?

yes...it IS a cowboy hat! Yee-freakin'-HAW!

starting the dialogue...

Well, here I am, becoming more and more reliant on this abomination of technology that makes George Orwell look like a wet-nosed puppy dog. Being frustrated with my inability to maintain email relationships with any kind of regularity, I decided (thanks to the Ibsen/Laffler initiative =) to try my hand at blogging. I figured, what the heck, the margin for morbidly embarrassing moments is nil, and since my writing classes have proved very cathartic, I figured, the more writing, the more healing - right - so let's start the dialogue! Maybe it doesn't work quite like that, but hey - it's all about finding our own Eightfold Path...

My hope is to keep this relatively current to my life - and shed some light on my world, as I view it through the colored lens du jour. I'll get some pics posted and some links to my favorite sites - all in due course...and would love to hear from you.

much love and true peace...shash